from The Babylon Bee:
I have had it up to here [I am gesturing toward my scarf] with the federal government’s slow, inept response to the coronavirus outbreak.
The clear solution to this problem is to give the feds more power. Trump is an absolute idiot, so we really need to make sure he has more totalitarian control over everything, like utopias such as the USSR and China.
If these incompetent morons only had more power over our lives, just think how great their response would have been. The virus would have been eliminated inside of a day if we just surrendered more of our liberties over to the bloated federal government that I spend all day ranting against.
Just take a look at China: they beat their citizens to death to stop them from spreading the coronavirus. We really need to be more like China if we’re going to preserve what America is all about.
It’s the final and only solution.
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